Everybody has fear.
It holds us hostage in our imposter state of mind, chained by our limiting beliefs
Fear keeps us in the pause of procrastination, worrying about what could go wrong, instead of delighting in the possibilities of all that could go right That insecurity darkens the lens of our how we see ourselves and the ways we believe others see us. It is the depth of despair of not knowing, which leads to not daring and eventually not doing
Knowing that we are not alone in experiencing this fear is important. So many of us wear confidence as a mask, behind which hides the inner knowing of not knowing and not daring. We are all vulnerable to our thoughts and how they we can often feel inadequate or uncertain, when it comes to taking decisions or actions. For some the hesitation is momentary, for others it can be so long drawn out, that we feel as we have lost the plot.
In truth the pain from the regret of not doing is much greater than the pain of not doing.
The best way to cope with fear is to step away, take time out and distract the mind by doing something else, from getting up to make yourself a cup of tea, or a meal. Start doing something to break the mental cycle of rumination. Go to the supermarket, watch a movie on Netflix, go for a run/swim. Switch the channel in your head.
Breathe through that panic. Deep breaths, yoga stretches, meditation… release the tension in that mind is a great coping mechanism to cultivate. This allows you to calm down and look at what you are facing with more composure.
Challenge those thoughts. Confront your inner critic and stop judging yourself, switch from the negative fixed mindset of being in constant failure mode, to the growth mindset of “Okay, so that wasn’t the way I wanted it to go, but life is about learning from mistakes, so what can I take away from this, to move forward ?“
Get out of the inner dialogue by speaking to someone. Get another perspective and start hearing what you are actually saying to and about yourself.
Being at your best, isn’t always about how well you can do in the moment, but what you are prepared to take away from the experience. Cut yourself some slack and remember to celebrate how far you’ve come, the courage and sheer grit that got you here.
Life is too short for what ifs, what matters is that you tried and gave it your best shot!
Shift from What Ifs, to So What’s and look at life as an adventure, which requires stamina, resilience, courage, and sometimes blind faith before you get to that stage of a life well lived. Being trapped in mental stagnancy is not an option.
When in doubt, just do it! If it doesn’t work, just don’t’ do it that way again !
Fight Fear by Facing Fear ! One inch forward, one small step at a time !